Growing up I was known for daydreaming the most outlandish things possible. I imagined all sorts of adventures in Narnia, and other made up lands, or simply in adventurous places other than where I was. These escapades were sure to include at least one handsome prince, daring sword (or wet noodle) fights, sporadic romantic martyrdom, and endless beautiful scenery. Daydreaming or reading were my escapes from whatever I happened to be facing at that time (from chores to leaving the only home I ever knew). Nowadays I don't daydream as much as I used to. My imaginings are much more earthbound at least. But, if my life were how I imagined, needless to say it would be incredibly different.
First of all, I would desperately want to do my quiet time every morning early instead of that desire hitting sometime later in the afternoon when I really can't concentrate. Unfortunately, a consistent quiet time only exists in my imagination. But, through that God is teaching me how to seek Him in every second not just when I sit down for a quiet time. And it just makes each quiet time that much more special.
Man, I don't know if I can even list all that would be different if I just lived like I do in my imagination!
I would be extremely graceful, nothing sarcastic would come out of my mouth, and I would always wear long flowing skirts!
I would eat smoothies, and beans and rice every day.
I would have time to stop and talk and pray with people all the time, and I would be so diligent in my homework that I wouldn't dream of working on a blog post before all of it was done. (Ha!)
I would adopt little boys and girls from every corner of the world, and have no trouble trusting God to provide for me.
I would find out that I am perfectly fitted for ministry and I would spend the rest of my life making a difference daily even in the little things.
I would never struggle with self image, in fact I would have no trouble forgetting myself and just letting Jesus shine through.
On a slightly sillier note, my life would have music playing like my own life sound track and I would walk through each day singing (I sorta do this minus the soundtrack).
Everyday, would have those Anne of Green Gables moments, and some sweet Gilbert would be my friend and offer me his heart. And of course, since I never would say anything wrong, our relationship would be more perfect than the movies even.
I would have piles of books of every sort and even more time to read them.
I would have lots of unbelieving friends that I shared Jesus with and never ever had trouble relating to.
I would- in short -be perfect. How boring. I mean honestly, just listing all this out I realize that the struggles I constantly have are what make me who I am. I wouldn't trade any one of the daily "I am so stupid" moments because they constantly draw me closer to Him. Some of the above things will never happen,maybe all of them. But the thing I have absolutely no doubt will happen, I cant begin to picture. I can only imagine.
Tuesday, April 9, 2013
Monday, April 8, 2013
Love...
I am supposed to be working on a paper. But right now thoughts are whirling in my brain about a subject that the world thinks it knows all about: Love. I've been reading C.S. Lewis' "The Four Loves", John Piper "Desiring God", I've been studying John (what my paper is supposed to be about) "the disciple whom Jesus loved" plus attending an Eric and Leslie Ludy event, with banquet two weeks away, and I just cant seem to get it off my mind.
There are different kinds of love, different words for it, even different ways of expressing it. The love the world knows though, could hardly be described as love. I was standing in the check-out line at Wally World (Wal-Mart) and magazines scream at me from every side about the "love" this or that person has or suddenly hasn't. Two weeks of engagement and one fight ruins everything, is this love? I think not! As C.S. Lewis says "Love, having become a god, becomes a demon."(C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves (New York: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1960, 82) (Ahhh! Turabian haunts me!) Not to be to quick to judge though, how often does my love for God fluctuate far more quickly than that!? In fact, human love in and of itself is never adequate alone.
Its a funny thing. I would have chosen Peter, as the one to call "the disciple whom Jesus loved." As I read the Gospels for Life of Christ, I see Peter loudly proclaiming his love for Christ, promising to die for Him, and even drawing his sword to defend Jesus, but then he denies Jesus when it comes down to the wire. John on the other hand is just always there, and instead of the focus being on his love for Christ, the focus is all on Christ's love for him. Maybe John had it right. Its hard to tell since we don't know a ton about John, and I don't like to make an argument from silence, but wasn't John the one who wrote "We love because He first loved us.."(1 John 4:19)
John tells us that love is sacrifice. God loved us, and sent His son as the ultimate expression of that love. Now I realize there are many different kinds of love: the love of parents, a friend, a spouse, but all the loves in the world require the unselfishness of some sort of sacrifice. Parents sacrifice time, money, and all sorts of things for their children, but they don't mind because its part of how they show their deep love for their children. "A friend loves at all times" Proverbs 17:17 tells us, that requires sacrifice, adjustment and lots of time. And the most beautiful love, that of a mate, created for the very purpose of reflecting Christ's love, is built around sacrifice. With love comes sacrifice, there are no two ways about it.
As humans we tend to want to avoid pain, or uncomfortable things, especially if we have to give something up. In fact sacrifice is that last thing we want to do. Ever. We don't want to sacrifice the big things, and we don't think of the little things. In really simple everyday things love means sacrifice. For example, (all you girls) loving your brothers means sacrificing wearing something you think is really cute, so they can be pure men of God. Loving your family may mean choosing to give up some activity, to call them or spend time with them. And here is a really simple little one, loving everyone might mean smiling, biting your tongue, and blessing someone when you are feeling bad and would rather just walk on by. Really little things, I know, but fill in whatever God is convicting you about. Love is a choice, to do something, or to give up something, no matter what relationship we're talking about. Choose love.
I may have just freaked you out a bit, I mean talking about love usually makes people smile and say pretty things. But when I think of love, I think of a man so torn He is barely recognizable, hanging on rough boards, with spikes in His hands and feet, bleeding love for the world. And because He loved me like that, I love Him, and everyone whom He loves, I love.
There are different kinds of love, different words for it, even different ways of expressing it. The love the world knows though, could hardly be described as love. I was standing in the check-out line at Wally World (Wal-Mart) and magazines scream at me from every side about the "love" this or that person has or suddenly hasn't. Two weeks of engagement and one fight ruins everything, is this love? I think not! As C.S. Lewis says "Love, having become a god, becomes a demon."(C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves (New York: Harcourt Brace Jovanovich, 1960, 82) (Ahhh! Turabian haunts me!) Not to be to quick to judge though, how often does my love for God fluctuate far more quickly than that!? In fact, human love in and of itself is never adequate alone.
Its a funny thing. I would have chosen Peter, as the one to call "the disciple whom Jesus loved." As I read the Gospels for Life of Christ, I see Peter loudly proclaiming his love for Christ, promising to die for Him, and even drawing his sword to defend Jesus, but then he denies Jesus when it comes down to the wire. John on the other hand is just always there, and instead of the focus being on his love for Christ, the focus is all on Christ's love for him. Maybe John had it right. Its hard to tell since we don't know a ton about John, and I don't like to make an argument from silence, but wasn't John the one who wrote "We love because He first loved us.."(1 John 4:19)
John tells us that love is sacrifice. God loved us, and sent His son as the ultimate expression of that love. Now I realize there are many different kinds of love: the love of parents, a friend, a spouse, but all the loves in the world require the unselfishness of some sort of sacrifice. Parents sacrifice time, money, and all sorts of things for their children, but they don't mind because its part of how they show their deep love for their children. "A friend loves at all times" Proverbs 17:17 tells us, that requires sacrifice, adjustment and lots of time. And the most beautiful love, that of a mate, created for the very purpose of reflecting Christ's love, is built around sacrifice. With love comes sacrifice, there are no two ways about it.
As humans we tend to want to avoid pain, or uncomfortable things, especially if we have to give something up. In fact sacrifice is that last thing we want to do. Ever. We don't want to sacrifice the big things, and we don't think of the little things. In really simple everyday things love means sacrifice. For example, (all you girls) loving your brothers means sacrificing wearing something you think is really cute, so they can be pure men of God. Loving your family may mean choosing to give up some activity, to call them or spend time with them. And here is a really simple little one, loving everyone might mean smiling, biting your tongue, and blessing someone when you are feeling bad and would rather just walk on by. Really little things, I know, but fill in whatever God is convicting you about. Love is a choice, to do something, or to give up something, no matter what relationship we're talking about. Choose love.
I may have just freaked you out a bit, I mean talking about love usually makes people smile and say pretty things. But when I think of love, I think of a man so torn He is barely recognizable, hanging on rough boards, with spikes in His hands and feet, bleeding love for the world. And because He loved me like that, I love Him, and everyone whom He loves, I love.
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